Judge Me Not!
I must profess: I am a planner at heart. Sometimes I can be messy. And when that happens, I am screaming inside! That’s how I know I am out of balance, stuck in a rut, or overwhelmed.
When am I at my best? When I exist in order, when my life is organized, when I can predict events. Unless I overschedule myself, if it’s in my schedule, I will make it happen. Time is finite and should not be wasted. I check my watch often. I don’t want to be late. I pack a bag when I go to the doctors in case I must wait. I book ahead so as not to lose out on reservations.
This can be interesting, perhaps frustrating, for those who don’t come from the same place.
MBTI® (Myers-Briggs Type Indicator) nicely lays out personality types consisting of 16 combinations of these 4 dimensions:
· Where you derive your energy and where you direct your energy (Introvert/Extrovert)
· How you gather information (Sensing/Intuitive)
· How you make decisions (Thinking/Feeling)
· How you prefer to interact with the world (Judging/Perceiving)
The last dimension is the Judger-Perceiver dimension. 50% of us have a preference for judging; 50% have a preference for perceiving.
Those who prefer judging like to make decisions rather than respond to new information; they prefer closure.
Those who prefer perceiving like to keep collecting new information. They are spontaneous, flexible, and responsive. They keep their options open and take action when pressure-prompted or inspired.
Do you prefer to get it done, or explore the options?
Where did you see yourself? Are you primarily a Judger or a Perceiver? Remember: there is no right or wrong or more desirable; only what is. There is absolute beauty in each and we need both types in our orbit.
In fact, Carl Jung believed that as we mature and develop we search for balance and ways to stretch ourselves. We are attracted to our opposite and strive to incorporate more of their preferences. The orderly, disciplined Judger appreciates the easy-going, spontaneous nature that the Perceiver possesses. The freedom-loving Perceiver appreciates all that the Judger accomplishes and is in awe of their lists. When you navigate these differences with love and understanding, you can begin to respect, savor, and celebrate them.
Of course, there are no absolutes and there is a wide range of behaviours that are demonstrated even with the innate preferences: we are human, we make choices, and we adapt.
I’m not uptight or closed minded. I occasionally enjoy the exhilaration of putting my list aside, reveling in the now, and going with the flow. I can afford to do it once and a while. After all, I have already built in a contingency plan.
Contact me if you’d like to learn more about your Type and how it influences all aspects of your life, including your career and your relationships.